The other day, during our impromptu Valentine’s date, in in which we went to Trappe Door and ate blessedly well, I was talking to Andy about what I want to be when the kids grow up and move on with their lives. I’m not trying to be depressing here, I’m just thinking I’m going to need something to do. After almost 20 years out of the “work force”, what good will I be though? What will I be able to do? What jobs out there might I be able to find training for? Honestly, really honestly, I hope the Myans are right and I never have to deal with that, but I can’t really count on that. So here’s my little list of possible post-child rearing careers that I’m interested in.
1. Food critic-I’ve been trying for some time to figure out why EVERYONE doesn’t want to be a food critic, then I realized it’s probably a very expensive business to break into. I mean, you have to eat at a lot of fancy restaurants before you’re famous enough that they don’t make you pay anymore and instead grovel at your table, praying you’ll give them a good review.
2. A horseback riding instructor-okay, so this isn’t very practical because I don’t have a horse and haven’t been on one in ten years, but I would really LOVE doing this! There’s got to be a way!
3. Bag Lady-No, not the kind that pushes a cart around the park collecting cans and feeding pigeons, but the kind at the grocery store. I totally enjoy bagging my groceries, puzzling them together to fit the most things in the fewest bags without tearing the bags or making them too heavy. Is that weird? Don’t make fun of my dreams!
4. Massage therapist-This has been a long standing interest of mine. I’ve been told (by more people than my husband!) that I’m really good at this sort of thing. In fact, I sent in an application to Greenville Tech a few years back (around eight) to enroll in their program, but I just happened to take a pregnancy test that day too. I heard back from the test first.
5. Bartender-C’mon! Who, after seeing Cocktail, Coyote Ugly and Cheers doesn’t want to be . . . uh . . . I don’t make a very good point, do I?
6. Writer of Children’s Books-Is this a cop out? This is a cop out isn’t it? It must be because I can imagine a LOT of moms, after reading through a ZILLION crappy books to find the good ones have thought, “Geez, this guy got paid for this? I could write this!”
7. Data entry specialist at a medical debt collecting firm. HA! JUST KIDDING! This was actually the worst job I ever had. I cried everyday on the way to work. Just balancing out all my silly dreaming with a little reality.
I wanted to do a nice, clean 10, but I haven’t really thought of any others and just making them up on the fly doesn’t seem genuine.
What do you want to be when they grow up?
Writing children’s books is the furthest thing from a cop out ever. I think more moms should do that.
I haven’t considered the idea of being a food critic before. I like that one.
I think the food critic is pretty great. I worked as a store artist for a Kroger back when they were trying to look more personal, and had to bag a few groceries when they got super busy. I hated it. But, I think your smile and sweet spirit could uplift and encourage people, especially young moms with crazy kids.
I want to finish my masters (only two classes left, another pregnancy postponement), get back into freelance graphic design, write a book (one or two or several, not children’s books), become an art therapist for autistic kids, become a foster parent for special needs children, become a professional chef, singer or comedian (hahahaha, it’s ok to dream big, right?), travel to every continent, and open an orphanage in some third world country.
That’s ten, and I’m one of those people who could keep going. I’ve never ‘known’ what I wanted to do. It’s all pretty much been decided for me. My art major at PCC was by default. They mixed up my major on my welcome card with someone else with a similar name. I wanted to major in music.
So, I’m thinking I might get stuck helping with my grandkids too much to accomplish many of those things. I might just graduate from mommy to grandma bypassing all the rest. We’ll see.
You’ll figure it out, and be great at whatever you choose.
I would love to be a movie critic, but who wouldn’t??? Julia who just turned 9 wants to work at Aldi, stocking and sorting cans. She says she just wants a medium sized life!
You go, girl! Your dreams are great! I’m trying to talk one of my kids into being a massage therapist and one into being a chiropractor.
My youngest just came downstairs and asked me if he could give me a massage…who cares that it’s 10:33 pm??